Revenge Is a Dish Best Served With a Meat Pie and a Clean Shave

Tim Burton's latest film adaptation, "Sweeney Todd", is a dark comic-musical about a barber bent on vengeance after being falsely imprisoned for a number of years and returns to find that his only daughter is in the clutches of the judge who imprisoned him, and although it is a movie that was not made for the faint of heart(that is if musicals make you just as queasy as a meat pie made out of a priest), there is more than enough charm in this movie to make this film one of this year's best. Despite the fact that most of Sweeney Todd is scripted in song, Tim Burton's unique portrayal of Gothic elements are second to none and are always enjoyable to see. The performances were fantastic as expected from the likes of Depp and Bonham-Carter, and the visual scenery was, as expected from Burton - exceptional in it's Gothic visage. All in all, Sweeney Todd is a must-see movie, that is as long as you can withstand an hour and a half of singing in the place of dialogue or if your stomach can stand the gruesome display of a maniac barber whose best friends are as sharp as the movie's wit.

Attention Amateur Script-Writers With No Talent - THERE IS STILL HOPE FOR SUCCESS

I have never so badly wanted to go deaf, dumb and blind before undergoing the massive torture that anxiously awaited me 2 minutes into this horribly written disaster of a film. Evidently, you can't always rely on a good cast to relieve the burden of a horrible script and a scatterbrained, amateur story-line, but such was the hope of stripper-turned-journalist-turned-wannabe "Zach Braff" - Diablo Cody. I can't even believe the high ratings and positive reviews(by credible sources) that this movie has received, nor can I believe the script and dialogue's comparison's to Gilmore Girl's, a television show truly landmarking of professional script-writing and exceptional mastery in story-line construction. Above all and oddly enough, the dialogue in this film embarrassed me. I guess I must have felt impossibly ashamed that another human being would write line after line of amateur dialogue that did nothing but expose the simpleton mind of Diablo Cody, who apparently thinks people say things like "This is one doodle you can't undid, homeskillet". And by the way, if you include lines like that in a movie, don't try and make it sound cool, expose it for what it truly is - LAME. Oh, and don't forget the forced scenes that either A.) were obviously attempts at eliciting cheer or ovation and nothing else, or B.) were too under-thought and absurd, pointless and unnecessary and whose sole existence within the film was made to arrive at a desired endpoint to further the storyline and could have easily been left out or at revised(i.e., were Juno and that future-foster dad supposed to get it on or what?). Amateur rubbish at it's worst is all that Juno equates to.